i may or may not mow the lawn

Good Morning, you Beautiful People!

Today I have my final scan of my legs. Based on my current billing (which is a hot mess -- I was told not to pay any current bills other than copays at the office since the insurance company and the vein center are playing volleyball with my claims), I won't be doing the sclerotherapy unless it's offered for free. Even with insurance and our FSA funds, taking care of my veins has been a hit to the budget. The medical issues have been addressed, and I'm not vain enough to pay for a cosmetic treatment.

Other than my appointment, I may or may not mow the lawn.  It depends on if it's muddy in the backyard.  If all of the rain has soaked in deep enough, though, it's time to tidy up outside.  If I can't do the mowing, I will at least bring out the patio furniture.

These things that I list may not seem like a sobriety check-in, but for me, they most definitely are. They help me stay focused on the things that make up a happily sober life so that I can concentrate on doing the things that support my hierarchy of values.

I'm feeling strong in my sobriety, I'm making healthier dietary habits, and I'm spending money responsibly instead of recklessly.  I feel so much better than I did on Friday and over the weekend.

I hope all of you find something beautiful in your life today, and as always, thank you for being here.

neglect

Due to laziness and fatigue, I once again offer you a poem from past-Me. She was 17 years old when she wrote, and 42 years later I still wouldn't change a word.


neglect


The memories that flew to the god
begged for mercy,
begged for their lives.
The god was deaf to their pleas
and mute to words of wisdom.
The memories, with their heads hung low,
marched slowly, ashamed,
to the dusty closet shelf.


1982